I try so hard not to hurt anyone, only to end up causing even more misery. I'm always fucking things up; in tired of myself, and I'm sure everyone does too. It just shows how irresponsible and hurtful I can be. Be it studies, work, friends, family, all I do is screw up everything, waiting for someone to clean my shit up for me. Can I please start to grow up? Wake up from your ideals. It's about time to face the music. I'm losing everyone, one by one, slowly. The reason why I don't have many friends is cause I just cannot manage it. I'll always end up neglecting and hurt them. I go with one, the other will be pissed. People always have a group of best friends where everyone can hang out with together cohesively. I have a group of friends who are only oil and water; they don't mix. No matter how hard. It's just the chemistry.if I'm really forced to make a choice, I'd rather just suffer in silence and go off myself. Should I just say goodbye once and for all? W